tmilkman

I am a blacklight fine art photographer, I've just been voted as one of the top 5 Visual Artists for the Portland branch of RAW Natural Born Artists, for the second year in a row. My art is intense in color, sensual, high contrast and, as most people that see it will echo, "unlike anything you've ever seen".

I am a Dom trained in Olde World ways, which it is very important that one understand so as to have the correct expectations. Unlike books you may have read, or men that may have led you astray, a true Dom/sub bond has nothing to do with pain, humiliation, bloodletting or any of those things some have twisted and shoved into the definition of what a Dom is. All of those things are sexual in nature, and can be brought in, if the sub chooses, but they are not part of it. Dom/sub is a true BOND, in which the Dom actually serves the sub.

In my world, the Dom doesn't "control" her, he reads her, follows her unspoken lead and enables her role or fantasy by assuming the authoritative role. He must be able to "read" the sub, because she may be too ashamed to outright say what she wants. He protects her vanity and humility by "making" her do the things she secretly wants to do or have done to her. He is there to release her of responsibility for her actions. All that said, it's really not about the sub "submitting" or relinquishing control at all. The Dom is a guardian, an enabler, a knight, if you will; taking the sub where she wants to go, not where he wants to take her.

I was trained to read a woman's coyness, her subtle hints and body language. Her deepest, darkest fantasies may embarrass her, but through careful observation and by leading her in the direction I believe she wants to go, I'll be able to fulfill her desires much better than the guy down the street and certainly better than the guy that has confused Dom and Master. There are very few "true" Doms around; many men claim to be, but their actions prove them to be insecure, power tripping men that have issues. A Master is just like it sounds, he "owns" his slave and she serves him.

Unfortunately, the term "Dom" has been drug into that equation; thereby tarnishing what is actually an honorable role. In a true D/s bond, it's all about the sub and not at all about the Dom; HE serves HER; the illusion that he is forcing her via domination is where people often get it wrong and is what turns some women off to what is actually an experience beyond their wildest imagination if she can find a true Dom she trusts and his knowledge of pleasures extends to being an "understanding" of pleasures vs an idea he got from some drunk at a bar. It's kinda like the difference between truly knowing how to cook and knowing how to read a recipe off the back of the box